Meguiar’s Air Re-Fresher review: can a smoker’s Dodge get back that new-car smell?
23.9.2020
Translation: Veronica Bielawski
Pictures: Giosue Ceniviva
One of the worst things about used cars is that cigarette stench. Meguiar’s claims it can annihilate the stink on a «molecular level» with its smoke-banishing bomb. Interesting.
The Dodge Challenger Hellcat. In white with black stripes. Cue the car fans’ tears. Because the Hellcat is the dream car. Sporting 717 hp, this three-door car is arguably the top dog on Swiss roads.
My Hellcat has just one problem: the previous owner was a smoker.
Bruno Justino, car detailer at Auto Kunz, truly did all he could: he smoked out the car with a mere 15,000 kilometres on the odo and treated it with odour eliminators. He even disinfected the seats and cabin. And yet, a note of cigarette remains. Layered over it, a light flowery scent.
Since I’m on the road a lot and often in the Hellcat – energy class G, of course – I really want that stench gone. Meguiar's promises to do just that with the «Air Re-Fresher», endearingly known as the «smoke-banishing bomb».
Smoke: the final boss of bad smells
The stench of smoke in a car is basically the final boss of bad smells. The smell not only seeps into everything but also speaks to us on a very primal level.
«Smells are molecules that are converted into electrical signals in the nose,» explains Brigitte Witschi, a perfumer from Bern. She manipulates this mechanism in her studio, where anyone can mix their own perfume.
You can imagine your sense of smell as a kind of brush. The bristles of this brush, i.e. receptors in the olfactory bulb of your nose, pick up the odour molecules and then interpret and transmit them to your brain as an electrical signal. The scent of a rose is actually made up of several dozens of odour molecules that are fused by the olfactory bulb, according to Brigitte Witschi.
The perfume industry has been dealing in the manipulation of the olfactory bulb and the extraction, combination and synthesis of odours for hundreds of years. They’ve also been examining why we react to certain molecules more strongly than others. This includes the question: why does smoke stink worse than a rose? And why do people have a stronger reaction to old cigs than to an amber-scented candle?
«We humans have two olfactory systems, one of which is ancient,» says Brigitte Witschi.
This – in an evolutionary sense – ancient system serves to warn us when danger draws nigh. That’s why humans react strongly to two odours in particular:
- acid
- smoke
When these two smells hit the nose, the brain sets off an alarm. Danger must be imminent and imperative; a few evolutionary steps before the genesis of the cigarette industry, fire and smoke did not bode well for us.
According to Brigitte Witschi, the perfume industry relies on two approaches to combat this intense, instinctive reaction. Odours are either overlaid with even stronger odours, or the molecules are broken down.
Meguiar's blast-attack
«Any unpleasant smells, such as cigarette smoke, pet odours or the stench of sweat and food residue, are completely neutralised,» declares Meguiar’s Switzerland on its website (in German). The smoke-banishing-bomb comes in three fragrances: Citrus, Sweet Summer Breeze – whatever the heck that’s supposed to be – and New Car. I decided to go for the «New Car Scent». Because let’s be real: it doesn’t get much better than the smell of a new car.
On the US site of the company, which actually started out as a manufacturer of furniture polish, there’s one sentence that points to how the spray works: «Permanently eliminates odours at a molecular level.» The grammar nerd in me is certain it should read «on a molecular level», but whatever; the word «molecular» is what really matters here. The inconspicuous-looking spray promises to break down the smoke odour molecules.
As you’d expect, the instructions for use are simple. Windows up, air conditioning with recirculation on, plop the can in the middle of the car, open it, wait 15 minutes, aerate and done.
0 minutes later: mind your head
I put the smoke bomb on the centre console. It just says «open». Okay... How, exactly? I press down on the top of the spray can and, to my great horror, realise it works just like any other spray can. No matter how quickly I dodge, my hair is now a walking commercial for Meguiar’s «New Car Scent».
So, a word to the wise: when you’re ready to set off the spray, bend over and lean into the car. Don’t kneel on the driver’s seat and press the spray can trigger. Your hair will thank you.
I also strongly recommend you switch on the air conditioning before setting off the spray. You should set it to recirculation at full power. This will allow Meguiar's Gas to also spread through the car's ventilation system.
If you’re planning to do this escapade like I did – after work, kinda sorta on my way home – you might as well make the most of the experience and stop by your favourite restaurant. I went to Fork & Bottle. Their homemade lemonade is not the only highlight; you also get to watch your car stand around with the air conditioning on for half an hour. After 15 minutes, you need to get up and roll down your car’s windows.
30 minutes later: give me an Aspirin
Here's the real problem: Meguiar's is lying. After half an hour, the whole thing is supposed to be over and the Hellcat is supposed to smell like a new car.
The good news is: the car certainly doesn't smell like smoke anymore.
The bad news is: airing out the car for just 15 minutes is not nearly enough. Meguiar's, please just say «overnight», because after a quarter of an hour of aeration, my Hellcat is still impersonating an Import Parfumerie branch. If you’ve still got to drive, say, 45 minutes or so to get home, beware: you will end up with a pounding headache.
But the stench of cigarette smoke? Not a trace. The price of a molecular headache seems fair. If you want to re-fragrance your car, I do recommend airing it out overnight before you take it on any longer spin.
But the «New Car Scent» doesn’t smell very much like a new car. The scent is pleasant, but it lacks the signature new-car legerity. There’s a heaviness there, and a kind of sweet note in the air that new cars don’t have.
But maybe that’s just because the concentration of odour molecules is so high that it’s overloading my poor nose.
I decide to leave the windows open just a crack overnight.
Three days later: what smoke?
A few days of airing out the Challenger with the windows cracked open, and my transient Aspirin addiction has subsided. What remains is a fragrance that is remotely reminiscent of a new car, minus the heavy note. In short, it doesn’t smell like a new car, but it does smell good.
And after a few minutes in the car, you can't even smell the smell any more. Nor anything else in particular, for that matter. Neither the smoke-banishing bomb nor any cigarette smoke residue. TL;DR: the thing works. Maybe it was Bruno's initial smoke-banishing bomb in Wohlen that helped. If so, I’d detonate two bombs, a few weeks apart.
But the Hellcat is back on the road. Big, strong and now featuring a non-nauseating fragrance.
Journalist. Author. Hacker. A storyteller searching for boundaries, secrets and taboos – putting the world to paper. Not because I can but because I can’t not.
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